Posts Tagged ‘Infidelity’
Major Explanations Why Men Cheat
Virtually all men understand and acknowledge that cheating is wrong. The odd thing is the fact that men still do it. Sure, women cheat too. Nevertheless the figures inform us that males are more prone to cheating than women.
Because of the readily available information to us currently, we could possibly solve this age-old problem of why men cheat. Testosterone must be held responsible for cheating according to a post shared at a psychology webpage. Based on the document, as little as 3% of all the mammals are monogamous and that small group does not include humans. Guys are meant to be unfaithful, so it seems.
A number of men are enslaved by unfaithfulness the same way that alcoholics are hooked on drinking, based on a well known health site. Addictive problems can be cured if the patient is willing to quit. Nevertheless, some guys are not prepared to stop infidelity because it is very hard to kick.
For some men, infidelity is usually a way out of the marriage when they grow bored with the relationship. Nonetheless, this is also accurate for a number of women. The truth is cheating, in this instance, is simply a signal of an even bigger problem. Something can be carried out to make the married couples remember the feelings that they had for each other when the marriage was fresh.
Actually, infidelity can often be the wake-up call that encourages couples to remind each other of just how much they actually love their husband or wife. Over fifty percent of couples who experience cheating will decide to stay with each other, perhaps amazingly. Much more intriguing is that fact that individuals who choose to stay with their partners report being more pleased in comparison with those who decided to go on with a divorce. People who stayed with their dishonest spouse are found to be more content compared to those who got a divorce and married again.
Women and men alike feel a degree of attraction towards the opposite sex. We’re intelligent creatures who don’t simply rely on our instincts or hormones in making choices. We are able to deal with the dictates of hormones and do what we know to be right.
You may ask: “can I really save my marriage after an infidelity?” and the answer is indeed. There are numerous couples who have regained their marriages with success. It’s not going to be a very easy journey certainly. The only real prerequisite is that both partners should be prepared to exert effort to save the marriage. We are not mere animals who only follow our instincts. We all have minds that tell us what’s right and what is wrong.
Engaging discussion concerning why men cheat. And this hyperlink features points with regards to save my marriage advice.
Should You Divorce After an Affair?
Firstly, if your husband had an affair, I’d like to tell you that I am truly sorry to hear that. I know how devastating it can be to discover that your partner cheated. I’ve been there myself and I won’t forget that ill feeling that hits you right in the stomach and the almost overwhelming sense of unhappiness and betrayal that plagues you for weeks or days.
But just because your husband cheated does that mean that you should divorce him or that the relationship is over? Here are a few tips to help deal with relationship problems like this:
To start with, most affairs spring from some kind of problem in your relationship. I am not attempting to let your husband off the hook here, but if you can understand in particular how most affairs start, you will be much better off.
There’s a very good chance that your man had an affair because some of his desires were not being met in your relationship. Perhaps he did not feel respected, or that you were emotionally available, or anything else for that matter. All it takes for him to fall head-over-heels for another lady is that she meets one of his unmet desires. Maybe she makes him feel attractive, or that he is important, or something else.
Instead of dealing with the problems in your marriage, your husband became infatuated with this other girl. It is, naturally, a slippery slope from a harmless tiny crush to an emotional affair, and at last a full-blown affair.
Now, remember that he in the end made the choice to cheat on you, so I am not blaming you for this. But it’s really important to keep in mind that you also had a hand in creating the situation in your own relationship that led up to the affair.
You can leave your partner or get a divorce. No one would blame you for that. But unless you are ready to have a look at the base basis of the problems in your marriage, you may be cursed to relive the same pattern in your future relationships.
You don’t need to divorce your partner. Though that is a choice only you can make, you can use this ordeal as a chance to look at improving your relationship and bolstering your love with your partner by working through this challenge.
This road won’t be simple, but by building better communication skills, practicing forgiveness, and cooperating together to find better techniques of meeting each other’s desires you and your husband can actually grow stronger together as a result of this.
Eventually the decision is between you and your husband. But there is nothing inherently weak or shaming about staying together with your man after an affair and fighting to stop your marriage dying. After all , the two of you probably did promise to remain together so long as you both shall live didn’t you? Infidelity is rarely something easy to address, but you can choose to make this either a curse or you’ll be able to find the potential within this challenge to grow stronger.
If you found this helpful and you’d like to learn more, please check out Marriage Sherpa or my Save My Marriage Today review.
Is Your Husband Lying to You After His Affair?
If you’re struggling with the issue of truth in your marriage after your husband had an affair, it is only natural. After all , you trusted him all those times he told you he was working late at work or going out for a drink with the guys. Who can say what else he might be lying about? And has he changed his ways or is he just saying that to placate you and smooth things over?
It is very normal to be suspicious of him and what he tells you, and maybe that’s causing some tension in your relationship. Perhaps he just would like for you to accept that he’s going to be honest from here on out and leave it at that. Perhaps all of your questions and prying is getting under his skin. Let me give you some relationship advice to help with this problem.
Transparency Is the Answer
The very first thing you must do is build a code of transparency between the two of you. Both of you must consent to be fully honest and forthright with everything you do. If there was an affair in your relationship, then there was probably not too much transparency in your relationship, you can most certainly benefit from this.
Now, the two of you need to make a commitment to doing this. This is not just something that your partner needs to do to “prove” himself to you. You both need to do this or else it will come off as a kind of punishment or punishment for what he probably did. Even if you’re extremely indignant at him and you would like to punish or get even him, you have to understand that that kind of thinking isn’t going to help in making your relationship better in the longer term.
Define the Emotional Triggers of Deception
We each have our own unique things that will cause us to feel as is we are being lied to. Perhaps for you it is when your man all of a sudden closes a window on the computer when you walk in the room, or when he is late returning home from work and doesn’t tell you beforehand.
What you want to do is talk with him and ensure he understands the specific things that cause you to feel like he’s hiding something and not being utterly transparent with you.
He, on the other hand, needs to come out and tell you the places where he felt the need to be secretive about things in your marriage.
Then the both of you want to switch roles. Even if you did not commit any form of adultery, have you been being secretive in any way toward your man? Even though it is withholding emotions or thoughts. Remember that transparency needs to be a two-way street if this is going to work.
If you found this helpful please check out the other articles to learn more about how to forgive a cheater or the other woman in an affair.
Spousal Infidelity: Catch Them The Easy Way
Finding yourself involved in a relationship plagued by infidelity is abject misery. It’s one of the most emotionally painful experiences you can go through, and what makes it worse is that it’s so senseless. You have so little control over it. You wonder why your partner can cause you such pain. Now if you’re like most people, physical pain is somewhat easier to take because you can see the wound. Emotional pain comes from all directions though, and it affects your whole state of being.
Then another source of misery that a cheater can bring to a marriage is in the constant wondering of why they do it in the first place. You’ve given them all you can and devoted her whole life to your partner and yet in spite of this when it’s time for them to give back, their off with someone else. Another person who in many cases doesn’t even care about them. In fact the big shock for many spouses who finally catch up with the cheater is seeing the “sad sack” they’re fooling around with.
So what most mental health counselors advise now for people who suspect that their partner is fooling around on them, is to seize the high ground. To take an aggressive stance and stop being a victim. You don’t deserve it and you shouldn’t have to take it, and the best thing that you can do for yourself, is to finally get to the bottom of what’s going on. Not just accuse your spouse or lover because you know already that this leads to lies. Rather to confront them with hard facts.
There’s a good chance for instance that you’ve happened upon a phone number that your partner has left around. Maybe something on a matchbook, or perhaps a number you retrieved from their cell phone. The all too common problem though, is that you don’t know whose it is. Well it need not be a problem anymore because now putting names to numbers is as simple as logging into a reverse phone number lookup site. A site like this can take that number, and give you a name, and a home address.
Then if you’re sick of sitting around wondering where your partner is going when they drive off into the night, you don’t need to wonder anymore. In fact find finding out where they’re going is easier than you may think. A global positioning system or GPS device once placed in their car or truck will relay back to you its precise location for you to read out on a map on your computer screen. You don’t have to be there when it’s going on either because it will also store all the information.
Then wouldn’t it be nice to be able to hear what they’re saying the on the phone together when you’re not around? And you know damn well that they’re doing it. Well now you can. Phone recording technology is now more affordable, compact, and easier to install than ever before. Plus the simple little device has no wires to hook up. Just plug it into a phone socket and when you get back home everything that’s been said over the phone’s is digitally recorded, and waiting for you.
Written by Frank Hart. Looking to find the best way to deal with affair marriage, then visit http://www.marriagesherpa.com/surviveaffair to find the best advice on how to save marriage.
♦Part 4♦ Marriage Counseling and Relationship Advice ❦Bishop T.D. Jakes❧
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